Column Why I Find Stupid Data

Right with the truth in the hallway to fall: dates give me how to peel potatoes in about as much joy and basically is also hardly anything else. You must out picking your nose just a bit, to get sometime to enjoy. Many a long term relationship girlfriend sees the whole thing quite better than I, almost already romantically transfigured: as a single woman to live finally in inexhaustible paradise of delights, so, as a crusty men Croissant would every second corner just waiting to be nibbled on. That’s maybe even almost true. Would have oven of life baked here and there a little too hot the male delivery range. Or even too short. After the first bite, nothing more than a single half-baked mess then remains although the face appeared straight but still so immaculately gilt. Waste of effort is called such cases and moments where you fixed on the dinner table candle light-soaked wants to pop his head like after the first three questions and before the main course. As an alternative to the Polish finish, to be saved in the hope of quickly passed out and strong paramedics before the ongoing disaster.

I sit mostly just, simply, because I’ve been always been slave my civility trained in. Anyway, I got the salad and Moreover the piece then eventually fried potatoes sit on my sofa.

You could at least now something honest say like “if you’re Romeo and Julia, I would we rather immediately died”, but I lack the courage, you don’t want that the other party thinks it would be him. So I start at some point, subtly in addition to behave. How to loose a guy in 10 days – you remember. Goes wrong also. Once, I was of course much younger than it is now, I unpacked a little weed that had forgotten my spiritual roommate after a headlined unit in the living room, carefully spread it out on the coffee table and then took one of the dried leaves between your thumb and index finger with an exaggerated lascivious gesture in the cheek pouches to put’s me. I had asthma, so I would no longer get high, but without cherries was not really good with my eating. The fried potatoes in love looked me in the eye and took a piece. After all, we could no longer kiss.

Off errors can be famously learned. But not learning, or ICH staying is at least very difficult, and casual-being in the face of the best bagel of all, which is still filled with Nougat cream, instead of thin air. Then is it mutates’s real bad and perhaps even to the potato, even before the 4-star dating disaster ever takes its course. I for example often don’t even make it from sheer panic for the first appointment. My schedule is full on demand until after next year, I’m hungry only at full moon, movies destroy my world picture and at the walk, the Sun blinding me. After the fifteenth the Ruffs abandon mostly, I delete the history from the cell phone, supplanting all secretly heard wedding bells from the blossoming imagination and start from scratch, so have no date.

Has a single, universal reason: it’s killing me to need to please in moments of courtship, I know this from experience. Just the thought of pizza filled with self marketing in the Italian gives me diarrhea. Dear about me, the Angeschmachtete would allow secretly playing fly on the wall and fall in love with incidentally and inconspicuously in my flat jokes and many quirks, serving is all horribly bad on prearranged ducks. It really comes to the sausage, the brain even in the pants, but to the ears completely dislodged me. I give too many at most four word sentences by me or a lot. I say things I don’t mean and leave off the most important. I forget to swallow and collect in the corners of the mouth saying cheese, instead of pointy red lips. When nervousness I believe me so unfavourably on the nose, that it looks like I would picking your nose. I swap the names of all the writers and philosophers, use pig stuff words when talking about politics and make too long breaks, when I’m thinking. I squint when I get upset and saiidi instead of laughing. You know that maybe. Girlfriends here terribly like to unpack the Blackjack of love values characteristics while they scold me sharply, because so much self-doubt had probably little to do with emancipation. But fear not interested for feminist slogans and I swear to you, my fear of dates is almost pathologischer.

An SMS with the words should me however ever “we want to sit tomorrow afternoon on the river Spree and not talk?” reach, I would be fired and most definitely there. What insanely cozy Utopia: no cross-examination, no pressure, no embarrassing pauses. Only a first common silence, the sky, and we. And because, where we were sitting, I would paint a croissant in a heart of sand, with a potato in addition.

 

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